


Reboot 487

by Lbilover



Category: The Good Place (TV)
Genre: Camping, F/M, First Time
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-06
Updated: 2018-04-06
Packaged: 2019-04-19 02:17:44
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,257
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14226945
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lbilover/pseuds/Lbilover
Summary: Chidi and Eleanor go camping.





	Reboot 487

**Author's Note:**

> For the Froday Flash Fiction Challenge bingo square 'Camping'. According to Michael, during the 800+ times their post-death lives were rebooted, Chidi and Eleanor made love 8 times. This is one of those times.

"Oh c'mon, Chidi. You told me you always wanted to go camping. Let's do it."

"I might've said it, Eleanor. That doesn't mean I actually _meant_ it. What if there are lions and tigers and bears..."

"Oh my? What's the worst that can happen?"

"We get eaten?"

"We're already dead, Chidi. We can't get any deader. Janet?"

Janet instantly appears in that disconcerting way she has. "Hi!" she says brightly. "How can I help you?"

"We'd like camping gear for two people: tent, sleeping bags, backpacks, you know, all that stuff. Oh, and junk food. Lots of junk food."

Hardly have the words left Eleanor's mouth when a mountain of gear winks into existence at their feet, practically knocking them over.

"I didn't forget bear repellent _or_ whistles," Janet says.

"Oh god. Bear repellent? There _are_ bears? Eleanor, this is so not a good idea. Ohhhh, my stomach hurts."

"Oh for fork's sake, Chidi. Bears are more afraid of us than we are of them."

"And you know this how?"

"I might've punched one on the nose once. I mean, it was trying to steal my Cheetos."

Chidi looks at Janet. "This is true?"

"Every word," Janet affirms.

"Oh god. You abused a bear."

Eleanor is unrepentant. "Nobody steals my Cheetos."

~*~

"Can we take a break now?"

Eleanor rolls her eyes. "Chidi, we've only been hiking for an hour."

"I think I'm getting a blister. And there are these annoying little bug things flying around my face."

"They're called gnats. Just ignore them."

"Easy for you to say. They aren't bothering you. And why is that, by the way?"

Eleanor snorts. "They wouldn't dare." She continues on, seemingly unaffected by any of the things afflicting Chidi, backpack hiked high on her shoulders. At least, he thinks (a little guiltily), he has the sight of her sassy rear to divert him from the annoying gnats.

Eventually Eleanor does stop, at the top of a steepish hill. "This is nice," she says. "How about we take a break here?"

Sweating and out of breath Chidi simply lets his backpack fall to the ground without a word. But he has to admit she's right: it is nice, nicer than nice actually. They're at an overlook that gives a picture postcard view of a cerulean lake reflecting fluffy white clouds and surrounded by evergreens. Some kind of hawk or eagle is soaring past, and a cooling breeze touches Chidi's overheated face and sweeps the gnats away.

Eleanor walks boldly to a stone ledge, dizzyingly high up, and Chidi says, "Be careful, Eleanor."

She just laughs and says, "C'mon over, bud. Don't be a wuss."

Chidi cautiously joins her, careful not to look down, and wishes he had the nerve to put his arm around her. But he remembers what she said about punching a bear in the nose - and that Janet had verified it - and keeps his arms resolutely by his sides. 

"This is really beautiful," Eleanor says. "You know, without you teaching me to be a better person, I wouldn't know how to appreciate it. I'd just be bitching and moaning about being in the middle of nowhere. Thanks, Chidi."

She looks up at him, her blue eyes sincere, warm, and he wonders if maybe he should put his arm around her after all. But the indecisiveness that is his curse makes him hesitate too long and the moment is lost.

"How about some of that junk food Janet packed for us? I'm starving." She marches over to her pack and begins to rummage through it, while Chidi mentally sighs and makes a private vow not to let another such opportunity slip through his fingers.

"What the fork?" Eleanor exclaims. "This isn't junk food. This is... this is... _trail mix_." She says 'trail mix' as if it's worms or dog poop. "Janet! Where are my Cheetos and Twinkies? I want my Cheetos and Twinkies, you hear me?"

But Janet doesn't appear, and Chidi is laughing far too hard to dodge the granola bar that Eleanor throws at him.

~*~

They make camp as the sun is going down. Is it setting in the east? Chidi doesn't know if there is an east - or north, south or west - in the Good Place. He also doesn't know a single thing about setting up a camp site, but Eleanor sure does. 

He tries his best to help, although he's more of a hindrance, but she doesn't seem to mind his ineptitude. 

"Where'd you learn all this, anyway?" he asks, watching her expertly lay logs for a fire in the circle of rocks he'd created at her direction. "I didn't get the impression you were the outdoors type on earth."

Eleanor shrugs. "One of my ex-boyfriends. He _was_ the outdoors type. Yeah, it wasn't my thing, but fork, the sex was amazing. Made it totally worth every mile he dragged me through the wilderness and every time I had to pee in a bush."

Chidi tries not to feel jealous of Mr. Outdoors Type. What's the point? It's not as if the guy is any competition now, and besides, jealousy is an unseemly emotion for a moral philosopher. But it's surprisingly hard to take the moral high road. Harder than it ever was in real life. Which is so weird. Shouldn't life in the Good Place be easier than life on earth? 

He doesn't have time to contemplate this particular philosophical question (which could take all eternity to answer), because Eleanor straightens, brushes her hands off on her jeans, and says, "We'll light the fire later. First we have to set up the tent. Believe me, it's a forking pain in the _butt_ to set up a tent in the dark."

Tent. Singular. Chidi realizes with a jolt that Janet had only conjured up ONE tent and that he and Eleanor will have to share it. "Um, Eleanor," he says, aware that his voice is embarrassingly high-pitched, "why is there only one tent?"

She gives him a look. "Dude, would you sleep a single wink in your own tent? You'd think every noise you heard was a wild animal coming to eat you." Without waiting for a reply, Eleanor walks away.

It's true, of course. He wouldn't sleep a wink. But will he sleep a wink sharing a small tent with Eleanor? The woman with whom, to his surprise and dismay, he appears to have fallen in love, yet who doesn't appear to feel anything for him except gratitude for being a good philosophy teacher? Not forking likely.

~*~

Eleanor forgives Janet somewhat when she discovers marshmallows, Hershey's chocolate bars and graham crackers are among the food supply. "S'mores," she says happily, tearing open the bag of Jet-Puffed marshmallows. "You haven't lived until you've had s'mores made over a campfire, Chidi. They are forking _amazing_."

"I can't believe you have room for s'mores after you just ate three cheeseburgers." 

"There's always room for a little s'more," Eleanor quips, and Chidi laughs. 

They drink coffee - instant - and eat several s'mores each, a messy process involving lots of finger licking, but Chidi can't remember ever having a better time, with the demons of uncertainty and indecision quiescent. He knows it won't last - he can see the tent looming out of the corner of his eye - but he's simply enjoying the moment and Eleanor's company. She's funny, and smart, and brave, and he loves her.

"You've gotten very quiet. What are you thinking?" Eleanor asks, tilting her head at him like an inquiring bird.

"That camping isn't nearly as bad as I thought it would be." It's not the truth, but it is true.

She edges closer on the log they're sharing, and gives him a friendly cuff in the arm with her elbow. "Told you so."

"You did, and you were right." She doesn't move away and she's so close that Chidi can feel the warmth of her body, like the heat from the fire that touches his face and hands, only better. 

_I'm not going to blow it this time,_ he decides, but as he raises his right arm to slide it around Eleanor, she stands. Dang. Another opportunity missed.

"Time to hit the sack, Philosophy Man. All that fresh air and exercise have worn me out."

She doesn't seem tired to Chidi, but he doesn't argue, just lets his arm drop and gets up with a rueful sigh. His leg and butt muscles are aching from the unaccustomed climbing, and he wonders that bodily pain and weariness exist in the Good Place. It's a lot to wrap his head around, too much, so he lets it go.

They put out the campfire, wash up at a nearby stream - "Chidi, we're in the Good Place and we're dead. I don't think we need to worry about germs," - and then retire to the tent. Once they've crawled inside, Chidi discovers that there's barely room for the two of them and their sleeping bags. He realizes that he's in for a night of sheer, unadulterated torment, lying so close to Eleanor and unable to act on his feelings for her.

Inevitably, as they shuck clothes and wriggle into their sleeping bags, their bodies make contact, and Chidi apologizes so many times that Eleanor finally says in exasperation, "Chidi, would you please stop apologizing already? Geez!"

He can't tell her that it's apologize or blurt out that he wants to make love to her, that all the accidental contact has his body hard and aching, and he's beyond grateful that it's pitch black inside the tent. 

They settle down to sleep, side by side.

"Good night, Chidi."

"Good night, Eleanor. Sleep well."

"You too."

Chidi stares up into the darkness wondering whether, if he waits until Eleanor is sound asleep, he can jack off without waking her. Truth is, he's pretty desperate. She smells... amazing. Like wood smoke and soap and toothpaste and something uniquely Eleanor.

A few minutes later, he startles as Eleanor's voice comes out of the darkness as abruptly as Janet winking into existence. "Chidi, I'm cold," she says.

"You are?" Chidi sure isn't. In fact, he feels like he might burst into flames any moment.

"Yeah. It gets freezing at night in these mountainy places."

"Well... I can give you my flannel shirt to put on," Chidi offers.

Eleanor makes a strangled sort of noise. "That's nice of you, but I don't think it'll be enough. I can tell it's going to be _really_ cold. They say the best way to stay warm is to huddle up together. You know, share your body heat."

 _Oh no. Oh no._ Chidi's stomach starts to hurt. If he huddles up with Eleanor, she'll feel his arousal. There's no way to miss it. And what's he going to say? The s'mores turned him on? As he desperately tries to think of something, anything that will prevent the looming disaster, he hears rustling as of fabric, and next thing he knows, Eleanor, soft and warm, is sliding across his chest, and tucking her head into the crook of his neck. Instinctively his arms gather her in, and she gives a little murmur indicative of approval.

Thankfully her body is angled so that his erection is out of the contact zone, and Chidi relaxes infinitesimally. Maybe he'll get through this torture without revealing the truth. But god, Eleanor in his arms is sheer bliss and he wants to do more, so much more, than just hold her. He'll do it, though, even if it kills him, and despite the fact that he's already dead, he thinks it might.

"This is nice," he murmurs into her hair, unable to stop himself.

"It is?"

" _Very._ " He speaks the single word with fervor. Too much, he realizes too late, because Eleanor moves in his arms. Oh no, is she leaving?

She doesn't leave. Instead, she props herself up on his chest, takes his face between her hands. He can barely make out her own face, only a pale oval and the liquid glimmer of her eyes. She looks down at him and says, "Chidi, you really are the densest man I've ever met."

The lightbulb goes on. "You set this all up, didn't you?" 

"No shirt, Sherlock. I got tired of waiting for you to make a move."

"I'm such a fool."

"Yeah, you are. But you know how you can make up for it right?

A grin tugs at Chidi's lips. "I have some ideas."

"Well, buddy, there's no time like the present. Get to work."

So he does.

~*~

Eleanor is sound asleep when Chidi leaves the tent next morning, a shirt-eating grin on his face. She'd been right: camping sex was amazing. He stretches, feeling the pull of muscles that hadn't enjoyed that kind of exercise for a while - and he doesn't mean hiking.

He wants to get the fire going, but first...

"Janet."

"Hi!" Janet says brightly from behind him. "How can I help you?"

Chidi puts a finger over his lips. "Shh. Eleanor's sleeping." She nods. "I need a table set for two, with a red rose, and Eleanor's favorite breakfast food. And coffee. Oh, and mimosas. We definitely need mimosas." He adds anxiously, "You do know what her favorite breakfast food is, don't you?"

"Of course."

Which is how, moments later, Chidi finds himself staring in bemusement at an elegantly set table for two, with a perfect red rose in a crystal bud vase in the center, coffee and mimosas, and a strawberry Pop Tart on each china plate.

~end~


End file.
